Among all the guys who contact me to get some help, a good percentage is about people who don’t want to be single anymore.
“I’ve been single for too long and I want to get out of this situation”.
First of all you have to understand that being single isn’t a bad condition.
It could be instead a great opportunity to manage what could be problematic to handle in a couple.
Plus, if you really want to get out of it, you need to work on yourself and follow a couple basic rules that will make you more interesting and attractive to women.
I’ve put together a list of advice I give to these guys. They’re not rules, they’re much suggestions to enrich your life and raise the probabilities to find your perfect girlfriend.
1) Use your time to learn something
One of the most important things a girl look for in a guy is passions. If you spend your life going to work/school, coming back home and wasting your entire free time on facebook/videogames/netflix or just jerking off, how can you imagine that she will like you?
If you don’t invest time cultivating hobbies and learning new skills, what you’re gonna tell her about yourself?
Cooking, reading, playing an instrument, travelling… These are just a few things you can use to make your life worth to be lived and told.
If you don’t agree with this, why should a girl be interested in you?
2) Lower your standards with girls
One of the biggest reason why someone is single, is that his standards are unrealistic. It makes me smile every time a student tells me that he wants to learn how to get hot girls straight away, without realising that dating is a skill like any other. You can’t reach the peak if you’re not ready to start the climb.
Hot girls are intimidating, and if you want to stay authentically relaxed in front of them (the only way to get their attention) you need to train your nerves little by little. Face easier targets first and when you’ll get more at ease, advance on the ladder.
Oh, and did I mention that average girls are 9 times out of 10 better in sex than hot girls?
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3) Force yourself to leave your house on your own
Of all the advice I give to my students, the one I prefer is “learn to get out by yourself, and keep your smartphone at home”.
If you decided to improve your dating skills, you need to train your social skills first. Be in a crowded bar on your own, without your smartphone to engage the time, is a frighting and enlightening experience.
It enhances your survival instinct. It teaches you that you’re programmed to be social, even if you forgot how to do it.
4) Keep your life in order
When we’re in a relationship, we’re somehow forced to look well, being well dressed and attend social events once in a while. Being single instead, there is no need to follow these things.
I’ve been single for long period in my 20s and I remember spending the day playing videogames, eating junk food and doing no physical activity.
Again, learning is all about habits. If you can embrace new positive habits when everything suggests you otherwise, you’ve already won your war.
Fight your laziness and keep your life in order. This will make you more motivated and definitely more attractive.
5) Don’t get stuck with the first girl available
This is a common mistake and I fell in this trap more than once in my past. It’s easy to get content with the first girl we get laid with after a while, even if we’re not sure she’s a good match for us.
This is mainly a consequence of our fears, like ending up alone if we’ll refuse this chance.
As they say, sea is full of fish. If you got laid, it means you can do it again with another girl that you like more than this one.
We’re surrounded by examples of couples arranged just cause “it was meant to be”. If you started this journey is because you want a better dating life than this.
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